Nightmare
by Creative Katherine
Summary: One shot: Ryuzaki has a nightmare, the Task Force watch on as Watari hovers by the detective to give any necessary comfort.


Chanting was heard all around him, his name being sang throughout the entire scene. His form being carried…spine laying on something hard.

Hazy jet black eyes opened as his dizzy head lifted, eye lids drooping dangerously and vision blurry only to hazily study he was lying on a makeshift wooden board, his head turned to where his hands lay as they slowly came into his view which were tied down by rope at either side of his body to the corners of the platform.

He tried to open his mouth but no words came out. All he could do was stay limp as his bumpy journey was carried out, making his stomach churn, a rising sickness overwhelming him, as his head returned to lay against the cold wood, lids having trouble staying open as he focused his attention on his tied hands, seeing a peak of someone's head through the cracks underneath the wood he laid on, bobbing up and down as they travelled.

The word _Kira _was heard throughout, also something about his name…something about sacrifice…

Some thing bright was cutting through the fog, the light source that entered his eyes from above…

…the sun…?

…was he being carried through a street?

How had he ended up here?

His head was dizzy, he felt so sick and could barely cling to consciousness…

…Someone had hit him…

That's what he could deduce from his predicament…

**_L TO BE SENTENCED TO DEATH!_**

**_L TO BE SENTENCED TO DEATH!_**

**_L TO BE SENTENCED TO DEATH!_**

**_DEATH UPON THOSE WHO OPPOSE __K__IRA!_**

The muffled words registered slowly, his cloudy mind desperately trying to piece the sentences meaning together as if it was some kind of riddle.

….

"-UZAKI!"

…

"RYUZAKI!"

His alias was shouted from afar, his groggy mind latching onto the only word that made sense. The voice itself seemed desperate as if something terrible was happening.

All he could do was lift his head in the direction of the voice, sore and blurry eyes seeing black shapes coming towards his carriers from the distance before black locks once again dropped with a thud. Words slurred in response, hoping in vain that they would be heard.

Before eyes could be closed for good... then, just then, a violently loud sound rang out, ringing in his head.

A…gun…shot?

Above the now deadly silence that filled the air, a familiar voice could be heard…the word _Yagami _forming in his mind…

All voices and movement stopped as if time itself was on pause. There was a moment of hesitance before shuffling could be heard, his platform now being levelled to the ground as black outlines of people now stood towering over him, his body staying still, not knowing what was happening.

"Ryuzaki!…Ryuzaki hangon!" He heard his name called in a rushed manner. "Aizawa help Ryuzaki! I'll handle this!"

Lids fluttered, once again trying with effort to look up, desperately trying to stay open as his ears heard someone yelling to what could be to crowds of people not so far away, his carriers leaving his personal space and going to the source of voice.

Soon after that was said someone was hovering over his delicate form, an afro being the only thing he could distinguish infront of his dark eyes, the person being careful as firm hands came to touch the detective's head where the pain was, examining whatever that caught his attention.

"Ryuzaki! Ryuzaki!" His body was shaken gently from another hand before the person seemed to hesitate, his cloudy eyes seeing the afro haired person's attention coming to be fixed on something.

Distantly feeling the person now untying his wrists as cold air caressed his raw skin, his body trying with great effort to move but failing miserably, instead all he could do was cough and choke, something wet spluttering from his mouth in the process.

"Ryuzaki!…Ryuzaki look at me! Can you hear me? Just hold on! God! what have those animals done to you? Chief he's not responding!" He heard the person shout as he was held in their arms, light once again pouring on to his frame as the person's head seemed to be looking over their shoulder.

Hazy voices filled his ears as they appeared to respond to the man's words.

Shade was once again over him, Hands withdrawing and returning to the back of his head, eyesight wavering and hearing going in and out as the figure did this.

"Mats-da- et me so-ething!"

The voices seemed to be getting even more distant as time went on. All he could do was lay there limply, no coherent thought in his mind.

"HURRY MATSUDA WE'RE LOSING HIM! Hold on Ryuzaki!… CHIEF I NEED YOU HERE!"

"Ryuzaki!"

* * *

><p>"Ryuzaki"<p>

His mind registered a voice from the darkness.

"Ryuzaki!"

He heard his name being called, black orbs snapping open as his body lurched forward in his chair instinctively, his lungs hyperventilating, thin and frail arms instantly outstretched to his desk, hands searching for something that wasn't there, his whole body on high alert.

"Ryuzaki…Ryuzaki it's alright!" Came a soothing but concerned voice as his arms were still suspended in the air, now being gripped gently as wrinkled yet soft hands tightened around the bones, the person's hold slowly lowering the detective's arms back to his sides.

Ryuzaki was still fighting the grip of unconsciousness as it stubbornly wouldn't let go forcing him to slowly blink several times, head moving towards the other's voice, his mouth now moving unconsciously, his normally monotonous voice holding a hint of terror, words spilling out to the other and overlapping as his subconscious fears poured out.

"Watari…people were chanting my name…I…I was a sacrifice to Kira... being carried through streets…" His voice continued to whisper quietly. "They broke my back so I couldn't move…being sentenced… everyone acting like loose animals, killing each other, just like the cases I've done…I…they knew my identity…I…made mistakes-" Ryuzaki panted desperately before his father figure cut him off in a fatherly tone, calmly, equally as quiet and reassuringly trying to put the younger at ease.

"Ryuzaki… Ryuzaki it's alright…shh…everything is fine…everything is fine…No-one knows of your identity…I'm here don't worry…" Ryuzaki stared with blurry eyes straight to the black shadow of Watari, the older man's dark face being highlighted from the glare of the PC in front of them as the only light source around their area, the detective's face blank yet his eyes shone visibly with terror, thinking the dream was still happening.

A strong and large hand came into his cloudy view, a blue-ish tint from the technology infront of them shining onto the pure white mug which was being held delicately in the older man's grip as the liquid became an offering to him.

"Here, drink this Ryuzaki."

His co-ordination was uncontrolled as hands clumsily reached for the offering, fingers twitching, the super sleuth still not fully conscious to know what he was doing. All he knew was that he trusted Watari with his life so he would drink it.

His being quivered, still terrified of something that wasn't there.

The older man noticed how violent the detective was shaking as Ryuzaki continously panted desperately for air as if he had been submerged underwater, deprived of oxygen for what seemed like years. Strong and firm hands wrapped around the detective's, cupping the younger's in his own around the body of the china, and brought it up to the semi conscious black haired man's lips, helping to steady the shaking, the youth not fully aware of his or Watari's actions, his mind reeling a hundred miles a second from the visions his terrifying dream had shown him.

Without even registering what he had done, the raven detective had drunk the entire contents in an instant, Watari withdrawing his hands from L's, taking it away from his smaller and fragile hands, putting the mug gently on to the desk in front of him.

Ryuzaki's eye lids drooped dangerously as he sat still already feeling calmer, his chest moving up and down more slowly as time went on. Watari's heart broke at the sight…he saw this regularly, being nearly every investigation the owl eyed man had held.

He held nothing but genuine love and admiration for L, knowing that even though the detective looked to be as hard as stone, inside, he really wasn't.

Deep inside L held the deepest and darkest secrets, knowing too much for his young age, his mind overloaded with burdens from the world.

…And with these burdens came fear. Ryuzaki, L, was afterall, only human… even though everyone thought otherwise.

Even _he _had his own insecurities. His own demons to fight.

All Watari wanted to do was comfort the young man, programme him to make sure his younger counterpart didn't have to go through this again and just make everything his son-like friend was scared off vanish.

…But… he knew that it would make no difference whatever he did to help, after all just like many times before this, Ryuzaki would remember nothing of this episode in the morning and such a thing like this would happen again on another case or whenever the detective was stressed.

It was a vicious cycle…one that never ended.

...

...Still…atleast he could try…

Try and ease the detective's subconscious mind…

...

Watari bent over towards the young man just then, not far from L's face.

"Ryuzaki…I will not let any harm come to you whilst I'm by your side. I am here. You are safe. You always will be with me." Ryuzaki heard the older man's soft and sincere whispers float soothingly into his ear as aged hands pushed his thin body slowly back down into the luscious seat that housed him, the previous computer chair that he used on a daily basis discarded to the left before he had fallen into his nightmare.

L's eyes were already closing gently as his breathing became more controlled as he slowly registered each word whilst something soft draped over him in the process.

All he could do was mutter his appreciation for the warmth and reassurance in response.

Within an instant the troubled detective was once again unconscious as darkness claimed him, eyes closing to mere slits before shutting altogether, his head falling slowly to rest on his chest, the darkness relieving him of his fears, Watari hovering by his side just to make sure the pale man really was out of it.

Watari would never leave L to suffer though something like this on his own and would keep his word on this to his dying day.

Atleast with the drugged herbal tea he had given Lawliet, he could claim some reassurance that his troubled friend would sleep dreamlessly for the rest of the night. He had made the concoction specially with nightmares in mind, making sure whenever L had such macabre dreams he would be there and ready to help make the sleep that the detective dreaded so much, more easy to withstand.

Watari watched the younger in silence, studying L with loving but sad eyes as he stayed bent down over the detective's small form, adjusting the blanket to make sure the Egyptian wool was covering the detective entirely.

L's form was once again limp just like before his violent waking up. Though this time his body was sunk even deeper into the chair, his head remaining bowed with his knees drawn up, his breathing steady and quiet and his body not moving.

The old man turned slowly, his eyes double checking L's form as he did so, making sure his young son-like friend would be alright before turning away completely.

...

"Watari" Came a concerned voice out of nowhere startling him.

He had forgotten the Task Force was still here…

How idiotic.

He was so used to there not being anyone around apart from himself and L…

His eyes hesitantly met Senior Yagami who was standing up straight behind a coffee table the entire task force were working at not too far from Ryuzaki's desk, the rest of the Members sitting down with paper work on the wooden support, the only light source in the room above them. All looked to be concerned for the detective as their eyes went to the kind old man.

"…Yes?" His tentative voice came, hoping they hadn't heard nor seen just how concerned he had been acting. Afterall he couldn't give too much away about himself or Ryuzaki.

"Is there something you need Mr. Yagami?" Watari tried to regain himself and sound normal despite his uprising panic and worry.

Soichiro hesitated as he studied Watari. "…No…I…I was just wondering if Ryuzaki was alright…it sounded like a violent and terrifying nightmare…does he suffer this a lot?"

Watari hesitated at that. Even through the darkness from half of the lights being switched off for L from where he was standing, he could see Soichiro was scanning his eyes for something…searching for that look…that look only a father could give to his son.

Soichiro was analyzing him to see if Watari indeed possessed such thing.

Such a thing for the world's greatest three detectives.

"…" Watari stared at Soichiro, his head turning slightly seeing the others staring back at him.

Knowing full too well Soichiro could not be fooled he had to give in.

"…Yes." Watari gave a deep sigh in defeat as his head bowed slightly, a hint of sadness evident. "…He suffers from terrible nightmares. He barely sleeps- and when he does, it's never peaceful. Bits and pieces of previous cases…well…perhaps I should not say, but… they do indeed haunt him."

Soichiro opened his mouth but stopped suddenly. There was a brief pause before Senior Yagami continued.

"...Watari…" Soichiro responded gently, his tone sympathising, "Is there no-one…he could see for something like this?"

Watari took a small breath, "...No …I appreciate your concern, but he has dealt with far too much in his years. Subjects like Cannibalism, Rape, inbreeding, Torture, children being murdered or sold as sex slaves in other Countries…every possible thing you can think of that society frowns upon, he has indeed dealt with." L's father figure once again paused."I know because I have been there…and no amount of therapy will help that. The only way it would help him is if he was to give up being a detective…but I don't believe that will ever happen."

"…He's… he's dealt with all of that?" Matsuda gasped out suddenly, still registering the fact that Ryuzaki had dealt with such atrocities.

"Yes…since a very young age."

Silence once again penetrated the atmosphere in the quarters, all present not knowing what to say.

"…Watari…" Soichiro said the name gently and sympathetically, cutting through the shocked atmosphere. Watari noticed just how much the other man seemed to be genuinely concerned for the detective. Perhaps it was because He was a father and L didn't seem to be that much older then Light.

…Nor different, for that matter.

"Yes Mr. Yagami?"

"It must…be very hard on him…being L, I mean." His careful words came, sorrow for the young man etched clearly in his expression.

Watari paused as he analyzed the statement.

"He is a very strong person Mr. Yagami, I assure you…It is just at night when everything seems to get on top of him otherwise you do not have to worry about his mentality. He's perfectly fine and stable."

Soichiro blinked at the unexpected response. A moment passed as he realised just what he had said and how Watari had interpreted his sentence.

"No, Watari…it's alright. I didn't mean that. You don't have to reassure us. All I meant was that it just must be hard for him…seeing all those things in his life time. No-one should ever see such things, especially not when they're so young."

"Yeah…has he ever…you know…done something… as in…"

"Shut up Matsuda" Aizawa hissed, knowing it was a sensitive topic.

"Oh…Oh..sorry…heh…he…" Matsuda smiled in embarrassment as his eyes closed and a hand instinctively itched the back of his head, looking away in shame so he wouldn't have to look at Watari.

"…" Watari stayed silent.

"Well…He does…blame himself." The older man blurted out before he knew what he was doing.

"What?" The afro haired man questioned as he tried to get a clearer image of Ryuzaki's handler as he positioned himself into a more comfortable angle on the sofa, papers in his hand momentarily forgotten.

It was quite hard seeing Watari's figure through the darkness where Ryuzaki was sleeping.

"…He…blames himself… for a lot of things." A small breath was inhaled before continuing. "…For victims of the Kira case, Victims of previous cases that he wasn't able to save. He never forgets…and yes, once it did get quite extreme."

"It did? Like how?" Matsuda encouraged as his head had snapped back to view L's father figure.

"Matsuda we really have no right to ask such a sensitive question! Don't keep pushing Watari if he-"

"It's alright… Mr. Yagami."

Soichiro's eyes came to rest upon the older man once more. He opened his mouth to say something but dismissed it, closing his mouth to nod respectively in the caretakers direction with soft eyes as he let out a breath through his nose.

Watari stayed silent for a moment, hesitant in relaying the information.

"There was one time…I…I went into his room once and found him…with a gun to his head."

"You mean he…?" Young Matsuda gasped with wide eyes, a shocked expression clearly on his face.

"..We always carry fire arms no matter where we go for protection, incase anyone's following us or watching our movements since it's happened before…." Watari paused, his eyes glazed over. "I found him…just sitting with his knees up on the edge of a bed, staring at a wall, not even hearing me call his name. He…he was playing Russian Roulette. I knew because I heard a click as he pulled the trigger and later looked into the chamber to see it housed one bullet. At the time though, I slapped the gun out of his hand. All he did was just look surprised. I asked him what he was doing but he just responded by saying he didn't know…"

Silence in the room.

"…I've never forgotten that day and we have never spoken of it since…I'm just thankful I came into the room before he…well…yes…."

"Oh Watari…that's awful" Mr. Yagami continued gently, sorrow visible in his eyes as he stared at the silhouette of L as the computer's glare highlighted his outlines. It was obvious Senior Yagami's heart was aching for the unconscious black haired man that was sat not too far from themselves. His attention then went back to Watari.

"I couldn't bare to think of Light doing that…I'm sure it must have been hard on you aswell."

Watari smiled gently at how fast Soichiro had sensed how much he cared for the detective.

"Thank you Mr. Yagami…for the concern. I know I shouldn't have said what I have, but it's hard keeping to one's self on such matters. I do not get to talk to anyone who I can relate to…Ryuzaki, even though he doesn't seem it, he really is genuinely a kind person, no matter what display he puts on. He just…finds it hard, communicating to others so to speak, so please, I just ask please don't think he's heartless, for that is definitely not who he is."

Aizawa's eyes narrowed, knowing the older man was silently and mainly directing this speech to him. His mouth opened, about to say something but thought twice about what he was doing and let it fall closed once again before averting his attention to the said young man's direction.

"Onto a different matter…" he cleared his throat. "…please disregard all I have said." Glasses were adjusted as the older man turned his back, now walking silently back to the trolley he had originally come into the room with, gripping the handle with both hands and swivelling it round, turning it to the entrance of the room.

"This conversation never happened."

"…We understand Watari." Soichiro nodded in his direction.

"What? But why-"

"Just say yes Matsuda." Aizawa sighed as his brow twitched, fingers rubbing his temples.

"Uh…Oh…yeah, right." Matsuda said slightly confused.

Mogi also nodded, knowing Watari would see him from the corner of his eyes before his attention went towards L's direction.

"…Thank you all. Please, if you need anything, just press the buzzer on the coffee table I'm going to be up for a long time. As said before, the button will turn Red if I'm unavailable. Until then, farewell."

"Thank you once again Watari."

"Not at all."


End file.
